Thank you and its importance in good communication

Thank you is something that we are all taught to say from a young age. Saying thank you is respectful and polite but it’s actually much more than that. We are taught to say it when we receive a gift, or someone does something kind for us. We say it as it is a way of acknowledging what the other person did and shows we appreciate it. Sometimes we don’t say it enough to our partner and we assume the other person knows we appreciate them. This may not be the case and often in relationships it’s important to say the words in order to communicate clearly.

As a response to criticism

Often when people criticise our heart centre closes up and we don’t even want to speak to them. Sometimes though criticism may be constructive and if it is then best to take it on board. In that case you can thank them for their feedback which also serves to neutralise the situation.

When people butt in

Similarly, sometimes we may feel like telling someone to just ‘mind their own business’ when they butt in. It could be a situation where someone thinks they are being helpful by giving advice but it can be quite irritating. A simple thank you can stop unnecessary conflict. Sometimes blunt, unflattering words can give us very helpful feedback. Instead of going into defence mode if we take it on board it may be a way to inspire our future progress.

As a response when someone is being nice

Have you ever received a compliment and flicked it off rather than just saying ‘thank you?’ Have you made it sound like you did nothing special? This is deflecting the compliment and devaluing it. So in future why not simply say thank you and let it make you feel good?

Running late

The usual response for being late is an apology. This keeps the focus on ourselves. Whilst it may be stressful for you to run late it is also disrespectful for the other person. So instead of a ‘sorry’ why not thank the other person for waiting for you, for their patience and understanding. This shifts the focus to them.

Customer service

What is your response when someone complains about your product or service? Do you become defensive and try to put the blame onto the customer asking how they used the product, or if they followed the instructions properly? Would it not be better to listen to what they have to say, thank them for the information, ask for more details and thank them for the feedback? Then in a calm way you can decide how you can cement the relationship.

Grief

Perhaps another important place to say thank you is when someone comes to you in grief after a loss. Sometimes we are uncomfortable and don’t know what to say so we try to calm them reminding them they will always have the memories of their loved one. These platitudes though really don’t help much. Is it not better to thank them for trusting you enough to share their feelings with you and to hear them out?

So as you can see these two words, ‘thank you’ can have a powerful meaning to show your appreciation and open the lines of communication with others. Perhaps it would be a good idea to use them more often.